Thanks MLD. It’s good to know that these struggles are normal at 6 months.

My husband is generally very supportive as long as I don’t start placing demands on him. One difficult thing is that we used to love sitting out on the patio with our wine, having these long, meandering conversations. It was great — We’d bitch about whatever annoyed us that day, make each other laugh, make stupid big plans, argue over books. Pointless, but it was a good way to relax, connect, blow off steam.

I don’t have the patience for these kinds of conversations now. When I’m sober everything has to have a point. It’s hard for me to sit there drinking tea while my husband grows tipsy and starts talking about how it would be cool to retire to Arizona or whatever. My brain can’t slow down enough to indulge in idle chit chat. I miss that.

And now my stepdad is in failing heath and I am going to have to figure out what to do for my mom, who has Alzheimer’s. This has been on the horizon for a while, but things are happening sooner than I thought they would. On one hand, thank god I’m sober! On the other hand, ****, I wish I could catch a buzz and blow off some steam.