DriGuy

I never felt like it wasn't worth it, but that's because I was so sick of drinking that everyday sober seemed like a gift. Once I got past the cravings, there was nothing about drinking to lure me back. It's possible that you are still missing drinking or aspects associated with drinking.

I was not into the AA program, but I was actually into the meetings. Surrounded by that much sobriety inspired me and gave me hope. I reworded the steps, and did them on my own in my own way. Many of them I had been doing anyway. It's not like everyone comes to the program bankrupt of all life skills. I picked up some new skills mostly from talking with people about how they dealt with specific issues, the things that were in the way of my personal growth, not necessarily those things that bothered Bill Wilson.

I made a program by me about me, rather than using a program by Bill that focused on Bill's personal issues. Bill and I had different problems. No two people suffer from all the same things. I shared a drinking addiction with Bill, but it pretty much ended there. For example, Bill seemed to be obsessed with morality, and possibly for good reason. I've never felt anything was wrong with my morality. When I violated my own morality, the resulting guilt was strong enough to make me think about it and not repeat it.

Like you, I got tired of listening to some people in the program, but I actively engaged with those happy in sobriety, and listened/talked an equal amount of time. If it is all listening in your group, find a group that is more into two way communication.

I lived in a small drinking town in Montana with a large assortment of bars. If you miss that life, you may not be ready to quit. This is perplexing to me. Why did you quit? Something about the drinking was getting to you to make you take action. People don't just quit when everything seems to be going well. There is something important there that you didn't disclose, or it went over my head.