Originally Posted by
NYCDoglvr 
This is what I discovered about myself. I had 10 years of recovery from alcoholism when I got caught up in a self-destructive codependent relationship so it was easier for me to see what I was doing. Instead of putting the focus on my own issues I shifted it to someone else. Initially I drank to not be present and then I became obsessed about someone else to not feel my real feelings. Alanon was a lifesaver, it taught me life is full of choices and some are self-destructive. In the end, I am responsible for all my experiences, that I get what I settle for.
Thank you for sharing this, NYC Dog Lover, this is my experience too.
My addictions shifted. All gave same result of enabling me not to be present in my own life not to address my dysfunctional issues. To have all my focus on sugar, alcohol, my partner etc depending which addiction was active at the time.
I can see my codie addiction is just as harmful to me as drinking alcohol/compulsively overeating. They all ruin my life and badly affect those around me.
It's funny with the codie addictive behaviour as it kind of hides within the label of me being "kind and helpful" to others. My denial is that I am a good, caring person. This is not reality as I am using my "helping" in a toxic way. A totally self centred way.