Originally Posted by
woodlandlost 
@Milano: That sucks! Keep working on your arse affirmation and turn it into key chain...I will buy one.
Also you raise an interesting question, why do they continue to reach out?
Ariseagain says: A reaction is what he wants because he might need you as a backup someday. I’m not saying he’s thinking this all through...its just self-preservation.
I wonder what other reasons they reach out when they have seemingly moved on.
And on the topic of my drinking did no harm BS...my wife used to say that her drinking never impacted our daughter...what a load.
Peace
He hasn't moved on. He wants to be with me and the kids AND drink. Being with me means:
-sobering up and being in permanent recovery
-once he's sober he'd have to finally be accountable that his drinking ruined our marriage, split up our family and he never actually ever recovered. He'd have to admit he has an aggressive nature when drunk. I think in the past he blamed his youth for his behaviour.. But a father... Husband. Too hard basket.
In my Disney minds eye there's a small part of him that really wants to sober up, be who he used to be and come back to his family and he's trying to keep that anchor.
From my Tarantino lens.. I'm just that one person who won't smile, talk or revert to form like his family do. I won't pretend it's OK and he has to see me weekly. I'm that constant reminder that his drinking hurts others. He can't ignore me. He's trying to normalise my behaviour so it fits his reality.