The night drowsyness is the best time. Its a kind of utter total painless relaxed. This is what alcohol gives.
sounds like a little like stockholm syndrome to me, man.
Obviously each and every one of us had something we liked about drinking...or if we drank enough to become a necessity drinker, we had something we liked that we lost and wanted to get back
but the really big picture for me is alcohol gave me nothing.
The opposite of pain is not oblivion.
I found more meaning and more profundity in a year of recovery than i did in 30 years of addiction.
I sense that you're looking for that meaning and profundity too Canguy.
D