Hi...you said first time forum writer....I think you will like "forums" its such a good way to be anonyomous and to air out your thoughts and get positive and constructive feedback.
And to help others...You already HELPED me...because you were "vulnerable" and I need to practice being "vulnerable" instead of always acting as if I am strong.....thank you.
I used to think like you when I was younger...especially when you said..."I figured I was younger and would tone it down"....I had that thought at exactly 17 when my drinking started getting to be heavy.
And Im 55...and still fighting....I did have some long term sobriety but for the last 5 years...I have not been able to successfully stick to any of my plans to stay "stopped"....
Nice to meet you.