Today's update: complex grief can make you really irritable. I have a lot of anger that has no place to go, and I think it seeps out in minor ways. Example: I was booking a flight for work. I have thousands of airmiles with the carrier. I wanted to see if I could use those miles to upgrade my ticket out of basic economy (it's a long-haul flight and I need to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at the end of it. Long call to customer service ended with the news that no, I cannot upgrade with airmiles.
As problems go, this is so trivial that it's ridiculous (I tried to think of something that would be more trivial and all I could come up with was being bothered by asymmetrical cappuccino foam art). But in the moment it seemed really terrible that I could not upgrade my ticket with airmiles.
I am not normally the person who gets bent out of shape because I can't have luxuries, but these are not normal times.