View Single Post
Old 06-05-2019, 06:06 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Gottalife
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
 
Gottalife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
I think I probably did. I didn't make the discovery until I was in my fifties and remaking contact with my extended family . They told me some things which kinda filled in a few blanks. It also explained some of the apparently nasty things my mother did to me even after Dad died. I cut off contact with her after that. She is BTW a chronic alcoholic of the hate filled variety. She hates me and the whole extended family equally. She is very fair minded like that.

Up till then I had no idea. Your parents are your parents, there is no basis for judging how good they are from the point of view of a child, they are just your normal parents.

It doesn't change the fact that I am an alcoholic. Early in my journey I cast about for reasons, but I concluded that even if I could pin it down to the fault of a single person, what good would it do? It may just create a resentment and I don't need one of those.

So I have concentrated on what is rather than why it is.
Gottalife is offline