Originally Posted by Zamie
the thought of NEVER having a drink again totally freaks me out,.
I know this isnít what you want to hear, but you have become alcohol dependent. This isnít a weakness at all. Itís highly likely that any attempt to moderate your drinking levels will see a return to that half a bottle of vodka a day within weeks.
As an aside, why would it freak you out not to drink again? It sounds like youíre not enjoying it, and itís affecting your health.
Back to the drinking, I probably drank about the same as you and was constantly giving up and relapsing within a week or two. Those two-week breaks were pretty miserable as the craving to drink came every evening. After years, I realised that Iíd never again be a moderate social or occasional drinker. Iíd revert back to the default levels of alcohol every time. Once Iíd reached that conclusion, it was surprisingly easy to stop for good. The cravings are still there at times, but theyíre rarer and less intense.
There have been no negatives whatsoever from not drinking, quite the opposite. I can still meet friends, but Iíll be drinking a coffee or an alcohol free beer. I feel way better, and my fatty liver (as a result of drinking) is now getting a well-earned rest and healing time.
Start thinking about quitting or Iím afraid youíll be switching between drinking and sobering for years. Good luck.