Hi Apri
I dunno - the longer I stayed sober the more I naturally focused on the day ahead and beyond rather than the days behind me.
I can never forget the depths, but it's not a load I'm carrying anymore.
I made amends and reparations where I could and for the rest I 'live right' best I can - I still like to think of my life, at least in part, as living amends, if you get me.
I'm a different person now with different outlooks priorities and focus
D