Originally Posted by
D122y 
I learned here that 90% of my anxiety and other crazy issues were caused by brain damage from years of being drunk.
I didn't really get better as much as I got used to the way I felt. Sr taught me that.
Getting well hurt like hell. It hurt like nothing I have experienced.
I wanted to relapse today. My AV was acting up. I thought about it like I have always. I thought about it like I was an active addict. Instead, I went to the gym and ran around the track for 30 plus minutes and did laundry.
I sit here still a non drinker.
But, I am an addict for life. I know what awaits me if I relapse. The story never changes.
I wear my sobriety like a badge of honor.
The main thing that motivates me is my health. 4 years ago I was a dead man walking.
Today, I am stronger than I have been in 20 plus years.
Yay!
Thanks.
This gave me goosebumps just reading it. And makes me sincerely want to cry. You're right and the hard work pays off.. I think about it a lot.. if I went back to drinking (though it's only been 6 days this time).. I know exactly where it will lead me and what I will do and how I will feel and it doesn't feel any better than how I feel in this moment. I know it might feel like it numbs me for a little bit but the aftermath is so kuch worse.. I dont know how to get that through my thick head..