I had a similar revelation at rehab. I entered thinking my problem was alcohol addiction and had only had the problem for the last 6-7 years. The more I learned and the more counselling I had one day I just blurted out “oh my god...I am not an alcoholic...I am an addict and have been one all my life!!!”
I worked out the times and years when I didn’t drink I smoked weed, when the weed ran out I would have a couple of shots of vodka to help me sleep but rarely ever drank alcohol. When I couldn’t buy any more weed I started drinking regularly.
Life only started to get better for me once I really understood and accepted I am an addict, stopped using what ever the crutch of the month was (my addictions changed all the time) and started working on my addictive thinking and behaviours.
Because I changed my addictions over the past 30 years from one thing to the next I never really believed I had a problem till alcohol came into the frame. Alcohol made my problems obvious to others, affected my judgement and safety, landed me with a DUI and a criminal record and so on. The consequences of alcohol addiction were far more impacting on my life so in a way I am grateful to have been there as without that extreme set of consequences I would never have tackled the real problem. xx