I really don't know how to feel about this. It brings back a lot of recollections for me. I don't know if I want to go there.
I think in one of my prior post that I said my father raped me, I'm not sure. I don't actually know if that happened. I was told so many things, and I guess my mind can sometimes manufacture things, but sometimes they are real.
I can't confide this with my sisters. They will think that I am trying to explain away why I was always the black sheep in the family.
My mother is 87, I think she wanted to tell me that so that I would know. My father never touched my other siblings, he didn't like them. One was a mistake and one wasn't wanted. I need to do some research as to the dates of the rape and the birth of my oldest sister. I really don't feel like it though. My sister is my sister, and I love her.
Guess my head is just really in a headspin right now. I need to talk to my mom some more.
Why she would tell me this and not the other two? I thought about that lots through the years. My mom always watched over the younger one and the older one. They weren't getting affection from dad. Only I was. (makes me really sick now). I really don't remember anything. I just remember being my dads son. I also remember some touching, I just don't know.
D@MN, my mother would not have told me this without having a reason to tell me this. I always knew there was something strange in how my dad treated me.
I'll just treat this like everything else, it's in the past and you already moved on.
amy