[QUOTE=PerSe;7186776]I cannot really believe it's all happening but I will be moving out and into my apartment this coming Monday. Everything feels so hazy, but underneath it all, I feel really glad to be getting out of this relationship even as I still struggle in the fog of thoughts - that maybe he really isn't an alcoholic, maybe he's right that I am just not happy which I say is true because of his drinking but maybe I'm just not in any case, maybe he really is the stable one, maybe he really does have his s&^( together and I'm just making too big a deal about some wine and beer - but I will not base my actions on these thoughts. I have deliberately worked through my reasons for leaving and I know it is right. I am trusting my true inner self.
PerSe, I could have written that entire first paragraph. Sending you big hugs and strength. Don't forget that you deserve to be happy too, not just exist in your relationship with AH. Your son's well being is affected by your own sense of calm and well being.