Hello all! I am new to SR, I found it while doing research on addiction because I am currently dating a recovering addict. I met my boyfriend through friends about 4 months ago. I am 22 and still live at home with my mom and younger brother. He is 29 and lives with his sister and her husband and son. We were friends at first and he has always been open and truthful about his addiction. He got clean around the time we started hanging out, so is about 4 months clean. He is the happiest he’s been in years, going back to school, and is looking for work. I can see the effort he is making for himself and his family in his recovery. My family knew I was spending time with him and knew of his addiction. They were cautious but allowed me to make my own decisions about spending time with him. Then things changed when we began dating almost 3 months ago. There is a mutual understanding that we both want to be together long-term. But, our relationship has caused a lot of tension and hostility in my home with my family. My brother doesn’t understand why I would allow someone who has so many struggles to be part of my life. My mom feels the same way. She is struggling with the new relationship it has created between her and I. We used to be very close, but because she doesn’t approve of my relationship, we have grown apart. She and my brother are struggling between being my overprotective family and being a source of support for my decisions. They are trying to let me go yet still stay connected as a family but are struggling with the choices I am making by being with this man and wanting to be there for me. My mom feels forced to have this person (my boyfriend) in her life. She doesn’t want a recovering addict in her life, but because I am dating one, I am forcing her to do so thus making her extremely unhappy and uncomfortable. I understand their concern and their fears. But they haven’t met him yet (we have talked about it and plan to next weekend) so they don’t know him at all. They are judging him based on things that are admittedly still part of him but untimely part of his past. I know that time will help our circumstances, but I’m hoping some of you have gone through something similar and are able to help me navigate through this time. The last thing I want to do is make my family uncomfortable with whom I choose to spend my life with. But I also feel that I shouldn’t have to choose between my family and my relationship with this man whom I love and care for very much. He wants to respect them as well, but wants so badly to show them the man he is working towards. He is willing to do whatever it takes to stay in my life, but my family doesn’t see or understand the man I know. I just want to find a happy medium, I want all of us to be happy. Any help or advice or words of encouragement would be appreciated.