I feel bad for even posting here because I feel that I'm not being positive. I'm exhausted mentally, not doing very well physically because of the stress and pain, and I just want some peace.
Ditto what Trailmix said- you are absolutely in the right place!! "Positivity" is not the answer to your troubles - and no one here of all places expects posters to be positive!! Keep being yourself, come with your troubles, we've all been there, collectively we've seen it all, you are not alone.
Peace,
B.