“You are absolutely right. All I do is try to keep him happy so that he treats me well. I made the list by the way.. with each point I wanted to add “,but...” so I obviously am trying to justify every horrible thing that he is or does... honestly there is something wrong with me.”

I was there until a few weeks ago. But what kind of life is it that you’re living your life for someone who can change at the drop of a hat. What kind of life do you want that you’re saying, essentially, you’re constantly walking on eggshells so that you don’t p*ss him off!?

Many “high functioning” As, like my AH can be super charming and really do well in other aspects of life. My AH is nice and wonderful at times especially with acquaintances and friends who are not close, and horrible at others. I was constantly fearful of saying or doing the “wrong” thing. I hope you can liberate yourself from that terrible burden.