Thank you for sharing your story. I feel for you. I'm the alcoholic daughter in the scenario with my sweet, sacrificing mom who bailed me out so many times.
I'm sober now and I feel a tremendous amount of guilt for what I put my generous, loving mother through...I did not want to hurt one of the people that I love most in the world. But my addiction to alcohol was in control of my life; until I removed the booze from all of our lives, there was no possibility for the relationship to repair or even just be.
As an alcoholic, I'm sorry for what you are going through...I also recommend the thread for Friends and Family of Alcoholics on the SR site. I read the posts often to remind myself of how my drinking hurt others and myself.