Sweeti,
I'm sorry things are difficult for you. But, like others keep saying, it's best to keep your focus inward right now. Getting involved in drama, even if it's family, will only make things more difficult.
I think one of the scariest things about sobriety was losing the familiar "comfort" of alcohol. I was talking with a rehab counselor and she told me I would have to prepare for how to deal with my problems without alcohol.
"What do you mean?" I glared. "I don't have any problems. There's nothing wrong with me. The only problem is that I drink too much." Oh, man, was I wrong.
Getting sober is a process and it can be difficult. We lose our familiar way of being in the world. I'm not saying this to scare you, but to encourage you to go through the process. And to keep your recovery friends close.
The good news is that as we get sober, we can learn new ways of living. Of coping. We can be liberated.
It can be scary and it can be difficult, but oh my God, it's the absolute best thing we can do for ourselves.
Please trust in yourself, Sweeti. Come here and talk to us. Go to an AA meeting or post here or do anything else instead of drinking.
There is an amazing woman inside of you just trying to get out. Your addiction wants to drown her voice in alcohol. Don't listen to it.
Don't worry about other people right now. Your only focus should be on staying sober and getting better.
You can do it.
