I’ve been sober two and a half years and took a break from my 70 year old father after this past Christmas when his manic episode resulted in a ruined Christmas Day and an aftermath that lasted a couple of weeks. It was pretty awful, and I was facing other responsibilities like moving across the country and changing jobs, and the stress was too much for me. I recognized that the stress was too great for me to keep my serenity so I prioritized. Sobriety comes first. I haven’t dealt with him and won’t, until I’m more balanced after all of the changes become more familiar and routine.
We are obviously in different places in sobriety but I think it illustrates that you gotta take care of you to be able to take care of others. You have more on your plate than I do because you need to get sober still. And when you are, you have to work to stay that way. Learning boundaries is crucial to that. I hope you take care of you first and others after that.