Originally Posted by
willetskillet01 
Ok. If you’ve been sober a couple years and asking yourself what’s next? Where do I go from here? I’ve done the stepwork, I put the time in and got a few sponsees, I’ve read, prayed, been to a retreat or two and got a homegroup but still have this sting that something’s missing - you’re not alone.
Church seems so unappealing but maybe that’s my disease. AA is awesome but lately I hear the same **** every meeting, from the same people and it’s old news and boring. Don’t get me wrong - I’ll never stop going but for now, I’m just kinda stagnant.
I want to delve into relapse prevention ideas and keep the “what it was like” fresh and still somehow foster that newcomer passion through whatever means possible.
What are some helpful thoughts on:
1. Relapse prevention
2. Staying “in the boat” - i.e. in the middle of recovery centered lifestyle.
3. Maintaining that drive and newcomer passion to work on my recovery like I used to during my pink cloud.
I never did a program. I think that’s why I don’t have these thoughts. I started AA but then I thought what if I don’t go to AA? What if I stop? What if I don’t like it? I wanted to quit of my volition, my own decision, because I knew at the end of the day, there was really no one between me and a drink. There was only me.
I quit forever on my day one. I said “no matter what I will never drink again.”
In the meantime I gained weight (and I’m a very active and vain person), I became quite depressed, I lost some friends, then my dad died suddenly and I had an enormous amount of guilt and sadness, I questioned my marriage, I questioned my life choices, I questioned my job....
I’m still sober though. I removed drinking from the equation. For any question, any situation, any heartbreak, any tragedy, any celebration, any holiday, any party: the answer is sobriety. The answer for me is, “I do not drink.”
It is part of who I am. It is now woven into my identity. I am extremely proud of and protective of my sobriety. Sobriety is my number one priority: and it has been, since day one.
But I am not in a program.
What’s next for you? Living. Passions. New projects. New friends. New hobbies. Vacations. New ways of looking at the people you love. New appreciation for nature, for animals, for all of the world’s beauty and gifts.
There is no stop start or finishing sobriety, even though you have completed steps. There is living sobriety, living, breathing, being sobriety. It is a living state of being, where drinking was only about death. Death not only of the physical (eventually), but relationships, jobs, reputation, mental health, spiritual health....drinking embodies death.
Appreciate how you are fully alive, and make it a daily task. We renew ourselves every day, not just when we complete a set of steps.