H,
What I tell myself when I feel a bit out of it is I have brain damage from drinking.
Brain fog equals brain damage. With each relapse it gets worse and worse and lasts long and longer.
Eventually, the crazy just stays. Wet brain or physcosis. Whatever.
I can never drink again or risk going back into that hell on earth.
I don't feel like I am missing out. I don't miss acting like a drunk. I don't miss being dope sick from too much booze or needing more.
I miss getting high, but now that my natural endorphins have somewhat normalized, I get high on other things. E.g. spending time w family, working out, seeing a show, eating out, doing projects...letc etc etc.
All those missing out feelings are really just physical/mental addiction and norm training. I am no longer physically addicted and I have made myself a new norm.
Mentally, I expect to crave for the rest of my life. I call it growing up.
It is the correct way for me to be.
Thank God.
Thanks.