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Old 02-18-2019, 04:14 AM
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velma929
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: maine
Posts: 1,548
This isn't a problem you can fix. That kind of abuse needs the help of a mental health professional. Is he willing to go? Or is he going to continue on the same path, using the abuse as justification for his addiction?

You know what? IF you decided to stay married, you could have a formal separation to minimize you financial obligations to him. If you got a divorce and he did get help and achieved sobriety, you wouldn't be the first couple to re-marry. If you divorced, and he found love with another, then you're divorced and co-parenting a child. None of those options are horrible.

As much as we want to help someone, it's worthwhile to keep expectations realistic about what we can actually do. I can manage a budget, and show someone how to cut expenses. I could show someone how to follow recipes and fix meals, and point him toward resources to learn more. I could teach someone how to use a sewing machine. If I thought I could help someone achieve peace over childhood abuse, I would be having delusions of grandeur. I'm not qualified.
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