Hi Jaguar55. Did you know that not only is the Jaguar a fancy car, it is a beautiful cat, of which there are only about 15,000 jaguars left in the wild? I am sure you knew that. They also eat deer, crocodiles, frogs, snakes, turtles, monkeys, eggs, fish, and anything else that they can catch. What have you, Jaguar55, eaten today?
If the thought of leaving him is too much, just start small: for the next week, cook something nice for yourself (not for him, for you), start doing some exercise, maybe do a closet clean-out or house clean-out and donate anything that is not useful to you or that you don't love. Secure your finances. Do you need more work? See what support groups are near you (Alanon). Keep posting here. Eventually you will find the courage to leave.
Leaving after 15 years is better than leaving after 20 years. If you want to leave... you can do it. If you can't leave now... you can make plans... and leave later (or not), but if you decide to stay, Alanon will be helpful.
