I agree with Midwest. At the rehab it was referred to as “Euphoric Recall” and does play a part on climbing aboard the relapse train. The three main stages of relapse are Emotional Relapse followed by Mental Relapse ending with Physical Relapse. Euphoric recall straddles both emotional and mental stages, in the emotional stage you are not thinking about picking up at all, you believe you are strong and have no intention of ever using again, no way, never! That is what makes the stages of relapse tricky as you can’t sometimes tell until you are in the later stages that your actually boarding the train.
You’re doing great so far Doris so don’t take the above as any kind of criticism, just make sure you understand why you are thinking and feeling what you are feeling so you can deal with it in a healthy way and don’t ignore any signs along the way! xx