Keep your head up. You are making things right now and that is what they need from you most. You cannot go back in time so you will have to focus on the present. They miss you and they love you and you are doing the right thing to give them their mother back. I can’t imagine how hard that would be so I don’t mean to minimize the pain you are feeling. Just that at this point you can only look forward. Be proud of yourself for how far you’ve come and keep going. I hope you have some support IRL too — and that you post a lot here and in Newcomer’s. Hugs.