Keep reading and keep posting. Let it out.
You might enjoy reading and posting in the "Class" of February 2019 thread - for people in new sobriety.
Here, link:
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ad-pt-1-a.html
My first month sober was pretty miserable. I was all over the place emotionally, I had trouble sleeping, I cried ten times a day, you name it. Day Nine was the worst day I had in all of early sobriety. I just could not get control of myself, my emotions, my thinking.
It gets so much better. Hang on, it's worth it.