Originally Posted by
Hopingwishing 
Drinking a bottle of wine in the morning because I feel ashamed of myself.
What has happened to me? Will I ever feel good again? How do I do this? How do I even start?
Been lurking on here for a while. You guys are my inspiration.
Welcome to the posting side of things Hopingwishing. My guess is that what's happened to you is the same thing that happened to most of us - we realized that alcohol had us in it's grips. I can still vividly remember those days of trying to choke down a beer in the morning to get rid of the shakes. I remember the shame too - for what i had done the night before ( if I remembered ) and what I was about to do by starting off my drunk again every day.
The good news though is that it can absolutely get better. And you can definitely feel good again some day. The way to get started is very simple - stop drinking alcohol. Yes - simple, but not easy....
If you are to the point of physical dependence ( I was too ) - you may want to speak with a doctor before quitting cold turkey. Withdrawals can potentially be dangerous, so it's best to have some help focused directly on your physical health.
You'll also find a lot of support here, and don't rule out seeking help from local support groups. Having people to call and see in person can be very helpful early on especially.
I'm glad you've decided to post....that's a big step.