Welcome,
Sorry for what brings you here. Sounds like a bumpy ride you have been on.
When I refocused my energy into ME and focused on ME I was able to see a lot clearer.
I was able to see toxicity for what it was.
I was able to move on
I was able to recover and start a life for me because without me my life doesn't exist and I am here for a reason far greater than I am aware of, just like you are! Don't cut yourself short. There is so much more life in front of you if you grab SOBRIETY by the horns and do the work, its hard but so worth it.
I wish you the best.
Please remeber you are WORTH it to be the best YOU for YOU