Hi Amusic, l totally get what you are saying. As l said all circumstances are different and my situation is as l currently see it 'bearable' and is no longer stressful to me. In an ideal world lm sure most people would prefer a loving sharing supporting relationship with their SO but there are many reasons that prevent this, alcoholism just being one. Its about figuring out what works for each situation. Unfortunately all the perceptions of how a relationship should be fly out of the window when you love an alcoholic.