searching.....your post from about a year ago, on Thanksgiving, sounds very similar...almost the same as this one.....I can imagine how worn down you must be getting.....
Last year, it was suggested that you get some support through the local domestic violence group.....as you were afraid that he would blow up if he found out that you were going to alanon…..
I hope that you will consider this....remembering that one does not have to be hit to be suffering from abuse,,,there is verbal abuse, and all kinds of other abuse, that allows you to qualify for support....
You can speak to a worker, on the phone, and it is completely anonomyous ….
You will find them to be very understanding, as this is their work.
They have support groups, individual counseling, etc. They, also, have all kinds of services that you m ight tap into...if needed...Lots of services that you might not think of.
I don't think you have to tell him about any of this,...you have the right for support for yourself. If he were to ask...you can always say that you are attending a woman's support group for your own improvement....
From what you describe....being sad...not seeing any way out....
This is too difficult to go through without some support....you owe youself and your children that m uch,.....
Make no mistake, living under this kind of tension takes a toll on your physical and mental health...and, that of the kids, also...