Happy Sunday all!

Hope everyone has had a nice weekend. Even through the struggles at times (Kgirl, I can completely relate to your post, sugar and all!), it’s so important to express that. I think our group does a might fine job at that ! 💪🏼 Strength in numbers !

I am sorry that I don’t make a daily post here. I know Daisy, you felt bad when you missed a day last week as you’ve only missed 3 days I think you said? That’s amazing and I’m so proud of you - of all of you!

If I committed to writing daily, I’d end up feeling anxious if I feel I won’t have time or too tired or just don’t feel like sharing sometimes. This happened to me in AA and needless to say, that program wasn’t the best fit for me. I’m a bit of a processor and I find I refill my tanks every few days and then look forward to checking in with all of you and posting. This group is always on my mind and I’m so thankful to be part of April 2018 class .

I have been ruminating on an old love lately and it’s hijacked my brain a bit. I can clearly feel the addictive part of me in motion. So I took a long bath, spent some time in meditation for ‘divine release’ - and made a bet with myself that when I have a thought of my ex, whether good or bad, that I would say gently “I honor this coming up, but this doesn’t serve me and I need to let this thought go”. I imagine putting the thought(s) in a little treasure chest and dropping it. The love we shared was beautiful and in some ways we are still comected, but I needed to go through this time of reflection - the light and the shadows, in order to really move on. Since there is love attached, I call these thoughts the ‘buried treasures’ and I will leave them be - ensconced in the deep waters. I recognize the beauty, and I’m grateful for it. I’m stronger for it and I understand that lquiet transformation is happening throughout this process and it’s exactly what I needed. .

When completely crazy negative thoughts enter my head space, I chuck these in the ‘trash bin’ trash 🗑 as fast as I can! I even say aloud “trash this one! Goodbye old tape!” Haha! It works for me. It’s like training a wild stallion not to buck, it’s feels almost impossible at times. But I find a way to overpower thoughts that fall short of being constructive in any way. When I find myself speaking with a loving tone, being gentle and patient with my emotions, I imagine a wave of blue energy moving through me like a river. My wish is to continue to associate negative or obsessive thoughts with negative connotations - the same obvisouly for the positive. After all, the neurons that fire together, wire together ! Taking this one thought and one second at a time... but it will add up - and I know how important it is for me to change my thought patterns and behavior. I don’t want my brain to stay addicted even though I have eliminated booze. The real work is just beginning for me and I’m finally up for the challenge 🙏🏼🦋

Sending love and hugs to you all. May your hearts and minds be filled with joy and contentment tonight and beyond 💫🌙💕