trailmix

I think in many cases it's just normal behavior. When you meet someone, anyone, why would you be anything but nice to them? You just met, you have no drama no history.

As people get more comfortable with others they let their guard down, that's normal, plus you are getting to know them better. The thing is with an alcoholic those things can be counter to having any kind of good relationship (romantic or otherwise).

But you didn't know that and you probably knew zip about alcoholism really (except that alcoholics like to drink a lot). Even someone drinking a lot isn't necessarily all that bad, it's all the crap that accompanies it that's bad. Plus it's progressive.

Normally the stuff that comes up is they don't empty the dishwasher or they spend 5 hours every Sunday watching football.

You can negotiate those things in a relationship, you can't negotiate alcoholism.

By the time you see it and understand it, you are already in and attached. I think the chicken analogy fits so well in these circumstances because there is a good side to most people (alcoholic or not) But the alcoholism makes the upside sporadic.

Anyway, just my take on it.