I am an animal lover, having lived rurally all my life with horses, cattle, dogs and cats. I try to keep my house clean and free of the various dirt or contaminants that dogs and cats are exposed to while outside that they naturally carry in on their feet. (I don't even want to talk about what they incur when they lick themselves.) I prefer to keep my cats outside (they have a heated shop to sleep in when they want). Dogs are crated inside in the mud/utility room at night. They are not mistreated or lacking in love, and they understand boundaries because of my consistent training. I would not allow a dog to sleep on my bed. Sorry, but those are my rules. When I met my partner he had a house cat who slept on his bed. When he (cat) got older with a sensitive stomach, he would wake us up barfing on the bed. Cat ruined several expensive down comforters even with a duvet covering. Once he passed away I have ruled "no more house pets". I like my cleanliness too much. It would be a deal breaker for me to endure that again.
Children are another topic entirely. The dynamics of extended families takes a lot of give and take, communication and negotiation. If they are adult children and need some supportive contribution from a parent, I get that. It's easy to feel resentment when it becomes a financial burden that takes away from a tight budget. If money is not an issue, it can still impact the spouse. I personally would never marry again as it seems keeping things separate keeps my security and sanity in-tact. I have my income, he has his, and we share our common expenses.