Originally Posted by LovePeaceSushi

I haven't signed on here in a while, but I did want to provide an update for those who are on here regularly and to give hope to newbies with loved ones addicted to alcohol.

My husband's been a heavy drinker for the past 10 years, and as it is a progressive disease, his drinking got really bad these past couple of years. He may have had stints of sobriety for 10-20 days, his longest being 59 days.

I found out in the beginning of July my husband had been having an emotional affair with a woman he'd had relations with in the 1 month we were apart in between the 6 years we dated and the 6 years now we've been married. They'd had sporadic "check-ins" with each other throughout the 6 years. I had no idea - in fact, some of you regulars may remember that he often was very paranoid, accusing me of sleeping with the meth-head neighbor 2 doors down, my brother in law, a fast food worker....just ridiculous people. (For the record, I have NEVER cheated on my husband in an emotional way or physical. I never even have one-on-one conversations or interactions with the opposite sex. Basically, if you wouldn't do it with your partner standing right there, DON'T DO IT.) Even past BFs that wanted to be my "friend" on FB were denied. Anyways, that was a wrecking ball to me, but he apologized, saying he was always drunk when he talked to her and that our marriage was bad. (Yes, our marriage WAS bad because of the drinking!) Her number has been blocked and I have taken precautionary steps to make sure there is no contact. I have full access to my husband's phone and phone records. Bottom line, though, and I know it, is that if I want our marriage to work (and I do, from the depths of my soul), I have to forgive him and trust him. He, in turn, has to be completely transparent. I am thankful she lives in a town 3.5 hours away and this was only an emotional affair.

Fast forward to about a month later. It was around 8 am on a Saturday and we were still asleep in bed. I heard something and felt a jerk and when I rolled over, my husband was foaming at the mouth and unresponsive. I called 911 and an ambulance came and we had to go to the hospital. My husband had suffered a seizure from alcohol withdrawal. Funny enough, he hadn't reduced his drinking. The only thing I could think of was that the previous day we'd gone to the zoo with our daughter and he did not imbibe during that time. That, coupled with a lack of water and heat probably was the cause. The doctor on duty was a Christian (as are we) and just flat-out told my husband that he was on the edge of a cliff with his body and that he needed to quit, and that through the power of Jesus Christ he could break his bondage and be free of alcohol. My husband quit drinking for 17 days.

It started with a certain client that likes to meet at a certain bar. I knew trouble was brewing when my husband agreed to meet him. Sure enough, he came home drunk. The next day, the same thing. He needed to meet another client to get some signatures....this time at a different bar. He came home drunk and bragging that two women were flirting with him at the bar. I was so mad - I gave him the finger and told him just what I thought. He took my finger and bit it, drawing blood! I freaked out. I called the police, who came out along with an ambulance. They wanted to arrest him, but I worked it out to where he could go to his parents' house instead. They have always thought I was the bad guy. That their son could do no wrong....well, they got a taste of their perfect son. He was drunk the whole time, rude, and a mess.

He finally admitted that he needed help and I arranged for him to meet with some counselors at an outpatient treatment facility that had been recommended to us. They insisted he do a medical detox because of the previous seizure. That freaked my husband out a little bit, because those places are a lot like jail - no belts, no clothing with drawstrings, no phones, no razors, no toiletries with alcohol like aftershave, etc. To his credit, he relinquished and checked himself in. He stayed for 5 days and he is now in intensive outpatient therapy for 3 hrs a day. He has also started to attend AA meetings.

For myself, I am in Biblical Counseling through my church, which I absolutely love and I see a therapist as well. The place my husband attends has a AlAnon-type meeting once a week that I intend to become involved in. Our daughter sees a Biblical Counselor as well as a psychologist and I intend on getting her in to Alateen. Things right now in our home are pretty peaceful. I have some emotional wounds that need healing, but I truly believe that they can be healed and things can be even better than ever.

I know I just wrote a book, and if you made it down this far, thank you for reading. It's been a long road and I (a) felt the need to just get it out and (b) I wanted to offer a look in the crystal ball for some of you that may be going through a similar situation. This is a progressive disease. It has 2 endings: death or recovery. I am praying for recovery in our family's situation and I pray for it for all of us who are affected by alcohol.

I am not just blue-skying my situation. I have seen a divorce lawyer to find out my rights. I am continuing my education in the event that I have to earn a living on my own. Be smart and take care of yourself! It's like being in an airplane - we have to put our oxygen masks on first before we can help others.