Prodigal..
I can soooo relate to your situation. My A and I share a business, a house and kids. We have to work together in order to support our kids....but almost everyday is torture with his obnoxious reckless behavior. He is the type of guy that is very overbearing and gets in your face. The more I try to ignore him ... the more follows me around and verbally baggers me. If I don't answer the phone at home, he'll just come barging into the house, even though the doors are locked, and start raging at everyone - including the kids. When he leaves he'll squeal the tires as loud as he can to embarrass us. It is a little hard to have serenity when someone is so aggressive and domineering.
Everyone wants me to divorce him, including his own mother. Unfortunately, at this point the financial stakes would be too high and very complicated. The state we live in does not offer a legal separation. I can't even get a restaining order unless I file for divorce even though he has been very physically threatening at times.
I live one day at a time and try very hard to find the positive to focus on. Hopefully with time this situation will improve and I can move on.
I can understand the need to not financial devastate yourself .. it can take years to recover from, if ever. Also, anyone can become sick or disabled, unable to support themselves ... and having a financial safely net can be crucial. It sounds as if you have a good future to look forward to... eventually... try to focus on that.