I am similar in that i am married, working and "functional". My wife is a heavy drinker though and in her mind i am able to control my drinking. Its kind of funny as the only time i drink close to moderately is when I've vowed to quit, and my drinking is in fact a relapse. When i try to moderate, i end up binging. Goes to show you cant read minds. My "control" is really me hanging on the edge of a cliff.
Everyones terminal dosage is different, and permanent damage is, by defination, permanent. I have fatty liver and a proven track record that i cant drink. Potentially reveraable, but it also can turn to cirrohsis. Theres a quote on here floating around that roughly goes "theres no problem that a drink cant make worse" If you think you have a problem drinking, you likely have a problem drinking. It has nothing to do with anyone but yourself and what you want from your life
Welcome!