bexxed

I wanna tell you about this tattoo I have. It says “nolite te bastardes carborundorum”. It’s not really Latin, it’s kind of Latin-ish, and it basically means “don’t let the bastards get you down”. I got it at about six months sober, in a spot on my body I can see anytime I want.

We let the bastards get us down. They get to us because we let them.

They are people, but they are also in our own minds. They are our memories, our habits, addictions, demons, inner voices, what have you. All of these wrapped into one.

Anyway SR is a tool. There are a few people here with good intentions (why would they not have good intentions?) who sometimes tend to point out things like Our join date, old posts, etc. I personally think that that can often not be helpful, but others disagree and we all have our own style. We’re also all struggling with a common affliction. All of us are one drink away from each other. If it’s not helpful, ignore it. Most people here don’t remind us of join dates or mine our old posts to poke holes in something we’re expressing.

Childhood defense mechanisms are brilliant for children, not so much for adults. Resilience as expressed here might be white knuckling. I’m not your shrink so I can’t say, but it sounds like a possibility.

Also, I have you beat. I joined in 2011 and didn’t get sober until 2016. Don’t try to beat me, though.

Who benefits when you walk away from a useful tool for recovery because some person reminded you of how long you’ve been trying to get sober? You? Us?

We come here to heal. All of us. We can only save ourselves, but we can help each other get - and stay - there. And you help more people than you know. Everyone here does.

The real bastard is addiction. It’s very resilient and ultimately for us it’s the one thing that really will get us down if we let it. So don’t let it. Ignore the stuff that doesn’t help. Maybe it would help on a different day or in a different time, so let it be. Don’t let the bastards get you down.