Thank you for posting this!
With active alcoholism/addiction, dysfunctional family dynamics and some of us with narcissistic family members, gifts can be loaded with control, expectations, psychological abuse and showmanship used to cover up or deflect from serious ongoing issues.
"Narcissists are able to draw attention to themselves while trying to convince everyone in their orbit that their brilliance is as blinding as they believe it to be. They turn on the charisma and charm and do all that they can to keep people's focus on their facade of perfection."
THIS IS EVERYTHING!!! and such an accurate description of my AH behaviors! I dont think most people actually see through it IMO. I think they see it and decide they are willing to use the narc for what they can get, and the narc eats it up because it feels like control. When faced with someone who sees it for what it is and rejects it then they act like a victim. "I tried to do everything, be everything blah blah blah" They are a victim of someone whose not willing to engage in the game. Not playing the game anymore feels like the biggest freedom in the world!Every action or inaction is a choice.