[QUOTE=DontRemember;6985438]
Originally Posted by
Awal 
Boundary(ies) about what you are willing to accept/put up with in YOUR life. I was going to ask you how long you plan on 'playing booze detective' and at what point will be 'enough',but didn't want to be too harsh. It's really a pointless act to try and montitor his drinking/intake. It's even more pointless to expect if you "call him out" on his drinking that anything will change..except for the levels he goes into hiding it from you. We are ALL our own people and we make our decisions based off of our own 'wants/needs'..Whereas, his current 'wants/needs' are to drink and keep it from you, your wants/needs,at the moment, are to catch him lying about it. That's not your place..at the very least it's not a healthy mindset for you to place yourself into. Check out the F&F section..lots of great advice and experience there too.
I'm guessing it's a natural reaction 'playing booze detective' for a while before getting to the 'i don't give a s*** stage. But I certainly don't plan to make this my life's work. What sort of wife would i be if i just shrugged and thought so be it..it's his life to waste, without at least trying to do something? I gave up a lot to be with this man so to accept this without some sort of fight (for want of a better word) is difficult. But I also see your point...we cannot control other people or their actions.
I've, without doubt, been in denial for a long time, been accepting the pathetic excuses etc, it was easier to think I could be very wrong, but am now starting to put all the pieces of the jigsaw together and it's creating one big horrible picture. I don't want to catch him out...I want him to prove me wrong...but I doubt that's gonna happen.
So I WILL be working on boundaries of: turning a blind eye as much as I can : focusing on finding ways to enjoy life for MYSELF : giving up on any hope i had of a 'normal' life/relationship. I accept that's the way forward now.