Originally Posted by
trailmix 
It sounds like you are in a strong frame of mind and that's great.
It's also a good idea to keep in mind that you might not want "acceptance" to become complacency.
Years can slip by while accepting what you don't really want in your life, going about your life while distancing yourself. Nothing wrong with that if that is what you really want, just pays to be mindful of it if it's not what you actually want longer term.
I guess the last few years I was terrified of him going to the liquor store while I was gone so I've been attached to him like velcro for so long and I thought about the situation before he left and I was kinda like well he'll be down there without me and there is literally nothing I can do about it so I guess I shouldn't dwell on it.
I knew it when I talked to him...he wasn't wasted but definitely lit up. I just went to bed.
I've always spent so much time worrying about it and/or crying about it or being upset.
I definitely don't think it's acceptable. He needs to quit before there are more adverse effects on his health but it's not up to me. I'm still changing myself. I want off all my meds and reverse the damage I've done to myself by never focusing on myself and always focusing on him and what he's doing. He can either change too or get left behind.