DR,
My whole life with axh I was trying to clean up messes before, during and after he was creating them. Once I got the divorce, I felt sorry for my kids having to deal with them. they are adults now and see how lost he is. They don't give him the time of day. (His family blames me for Poisoning their minds against him). Our work load gets lighter when we don't have to run around putting out fires. Let it happen and see where it falls. I am sorry, hugs!!