Ah man, I feel for you. I know that persistent and defeating feeling. The past is a sad predictor at times - and many of us, myself included, have let ourselves and our loved ones down time and time again.
The good news is that we need not be a statistic on that side of the ledger. You can finally, for good, stop drinking and claim the life you want and you deserve. It takes real work and some suffering and some sacrifice. But as far as I can tell, it's a truly meaningful journey. Maybe the most valuable one we can all take.
Also I caution you in recognizing that the voice telling you that you are going to fail again is your AV, your demons. They want you to lose steam, to question yourself, to throw your hands up and say "oh well I know I'm going to fail one day, might as well start drinking today..." You need to recognize this voice and shut it the f up.
Thank you for the post. Had me thinking too about my doubts, which persist. Here's to staying strong.