Originally Posted by
lessgravity 
Prof - I've seen you around these parts too many times to accept you got sober was:
"I joined this site after an embarrassing night out. I still feel a pang of regret when I think about it, but the memory has faded, and I'm worried I need a stronger reason to fight the AV. "
I went back and read your posts - I see these words that strike me:
shame
terrified of hurting someone/myself
living a double life
guilt
negative effects on depression/money
uncomfortable in own skin
exhausting way to live
vomiting
in bed all day - no way to live
and "What saved me once is killing me"
I don't pick out all those lines to make you feel bad - I felt exactly the same way. But when I read your post today I was struck by the lack of urgency in your words.
For me, I think it was the gradual accumulation of all of the things you list - finally seeing my life being lived only in part, only in shadow, ashamed, guilty, having given in again and again to the poison.
Just like you, I needed to really articulate each and every reason and stop lying to myself that I was "functioning" alcoholic. What does that even mean? It's a misnomer - even drunks who have given in entirely to the poison are "functioning" on some level.
You gotta really articulate and be honest with yourself Prof. I smell AV/relapse in the way you minimized your reasons for quitting.
Happy to see you on the sober side. Stay with us here, for good.
Less, I am absolutely not saying that I am a functioning alcoholic. I think I've only ever used that term to describe myself when I put the term in scare quotes. I've been the first person to agree that's not a real thing. Maybe my post didn't sound "urgent" or "honest" to you, but I don't feel like my AV motivated the question. I'm also definitely not saying that the only reason I got sober was that one night...What I meant to say was that evening was the crisis which first brought me to the site. Now I have many little reasons (derived from the posts you've quote from and other negative consequences), but no single, big reason.
Based on the responses I've received here, it seems like the many little reasons are enough motivation for most people.