Horn - As I've read through this thread I have pondered what I would be feeling if I was in your shoes. I would be ticked. There is no excuse other than if your wife was in jail or *worse* in a hospital, for her not to call you (or text, a chickensh*t way of explaining but better than nothing).
I'd be very hurt if my spouse was acting like this (going out drinking with her buddies and staying out all night) while I was working on my sobriety. Please stay as focused as you can on YOU.