My personal perspective; Would YOU still be with you? You're, in a sense, putting her into a yes/no "capsule". Red/blue pill.. Is that fair? Do you expect her to put up with this behavior for long? It's NOT her it's YOU! (Unless some seedy marriage stuff led you to the bottle and the it's on you to decide what you want to do.)..However I don't catch that 'vibe'.. I sense that she doesn't trust you(would you trust you?).. IF you want to TRY and remain with her, you have to show her change..not by words,but actions.. Stop blaming outter things on your drinking,man. You drink because you drink..Very simple..Choose your side and run with it.
I was at the 'phase' towards my end drink that I could not see my life without my partner..It was my drinking that had me in that mindset,, Live your life,man..if you want to drink..drink(don't expect anything except horrible nonsense)...or..if you want to get get better,get better. It's work and all that,but..it's better than the other option. Your wife could very well be done with you,but does trying to decifer every move/face she make any difference?..NO. You get sober for yourself,bud.