Originally Posted by
Noona88 
You are entitled to your opinion and just to be clear i am not blaming anyone but myself. I just dont think and feel it’s right for anyone to get sexually assaulted when they are incoherent!
You are right and your thoughts about the sexual assault thing are 100% valid.
I hope you see that there's two separate issues here. If you were assaulted or believe you were do what you feel you need to to deal with it - police, health testing, therapy, all of the above, whatever. Seriously, it's a serious thing.
The other issue is the root cause. The booze. You ask how to forgive yourself etc., etc. Well, for now stop worrying about that. The answer is to take the first step and detox. Stop drinking. Make it a priority to start educating yourself about the nature of your relationship with alcohol. Make it THE priority.
The bigger questions you have can either be dealt with down the road or - you'll find - some questions end up not needing answers. Time has a way of dealing with things without a need for our interference and control.
So yea, keep things straightforward. Stop drinking. Start educating yourself. Knowledge is power. Don't be a victim.
Best-
B