I think your asking the wrong question slipandslide, it doesn't really matter why you pick up the drink at this stage. What matters is that you do. The real question you should be asking yourself is "What do I need to do to make sure I do not have that first drink".
Think of it this way, if you fell over and broke your leg, would you just lay there in pain trying to work out why you had fallen over, or would you call for help and concentrate on getting it fixed?