Has it ended like that before? You drinking when you didn't have any prior intentions? Drinking more and more and more and then not remembering?
Do you think the stress of the hospice was too much?
Life throws death at me on a pretty regular basis. It's a struggle, for sure - but I don't drink at it any more.
Blessings to your family at this difficult time of hospice. I hope you will be able to put down the drink and be really present at this time.