Hi all. I am struggling a bit today. Got the blues quite bad and I don't really know why. Maybe its another lonely bank holiday. I went to church yesterday morning, then onto my friends house for a bbq, it was lovely, lots of my other friends there and people I hadn't met before but really liked. Lots of booze but it didn't bother me. It was my friend of over 30 years house and I always feel so comfortable with her I never think of relapse. Couldn't sleep last night, don't know why but that hasn't helped my mood. Came back home this afternoon. Its a beautiful day, the town is packed with tourists as it was the annual duck race. everyone down at the river having fun. I am just sitting indoors alone and feeling blue. Even crying a lot which I hadn't done since early days of sobriety. Tomorrow morning I am volunteering at the local theatre (am learning to be a tour guide), in the afternoon I am at the charity shop which I love. But right now I am really down. I am not craving a drink but in a way missing the oblivion it gave me. I am trying so hard to be positive and I know this will pass but right now its rubbish.
Sorry to moan. Just wanted to post how I feel. I am just over 4 months sober and I haven't felt like this since the first few weeks of sobriety. Its horrible.